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Slightly more than one-half score and seven weeks from now, I will bring forth, on this continent, a new youngster, conceived in love and dedicated to the ideals of fairness, honesty, openmindedness, kindness, generosity, common sense, and good humor.
Now I am engaged in a great gestation process, testing whether I, or any woman so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. I have come to dedicate a portion of my body, known as the uterus, as a temporary resting place for that youngster who is growing by the day so that he may come forth to do good in this world. It seems altogether fitting and proper that I should do this.
But in a larger sense, even though I gestate — and fully participate — I cannot anticipate — what shall occur. This brave little one shall control his own destiny, far above my poor power to nurture. The world will little note nor long remember what I say (unless I’m really lucky), but it is my great hope that my child will help lead us to brighter futures. It is for me to be dedicated to the great task remaining before me — that from the great sense of love, safety, and compassion his father and I shall provide to him, he resolves that our efforts shall not have been in vain — that this world shall have a new birth of peace — and that fairness, honesty, openmindedness, kindness, generosity, common sense, and good humor, shall not perish from the earth.
Hear, hear! harumph harumph harumph
That is very well said!
I second that motion!
I believe I have already signed the “Insemination proclamation” into law… OK, I will stop now. : )
Kidding aside, I love this. You should be a humor writer. Very clever and touching my wife.
I was a bit worried that I was going to have problems reminding you just why a child is still a good idea even with the seriously evil crap in the world. But I am glad to see that you seem to have it down. I think I will print this out and keep it handy for inspiration when I start to have those thoughts. : )
You know that I can see the beauty and the light of things in the world as well as the rust and the decay. It makes me “special” (in the head) : ) But since most people choose to ignore the very evil stuff around us, I tend to look like a “dark ” person sometimes by comparison. I was afraid I lacked the tools to help you stay upbeat and positive about having a baby. I have never doubted it was the right thing to do, even in these troubled times the world faces. (is it really ever that much better?)
The short of it is that for every person that thinks its cool to create or use one of these…
Pure Concentrated Evil! Don’t Click This!
There needs to be people trying to teach as many kids of the next generation as possible that we don’t need to do that kinda crap… Maybe it will take 5000 years, but someday those smart and healthy kids who grew up knowing better will figure out how to heal things and turn the world into a place were we never ask “why should I have a baby when the world is so messed up?”
We have to keep moving forward, and I an very proud and honored that I get to move in that direction with you… and little baby Aquaman.