Headache

A little broken.

Tonight it got to me a little. I was doing okay today, mostly, until just now. I went to work, talked to Doc a couple times about the headache stuff (and he’s having a really bad day, which is emotionally stressful for us both), we went to see our new financial guy who is going to make it so we don’t have to expend frustrated brain power on our investment strategies, and then I promised Doc I’d cook spaghetti tonight when we got home. After fighting traffic across town at 5, we talked on the phone to Dr. Aronoff’s nurse, who told us that the options were to take a different painkiller or, if it was worrying Doc, to go to the ER. Can someone please tell me exactly how WE are supposed to know if we should be worried? Isn’t that what the doctor is supposed to use his years of medical training to determine?! I think an eleven day long headache is pretty fucking worrisome, but for a doctor to tell us to go to the ER to get a brain scan if WE think it’s something to worry about… I just don’t understand that reasoning. Anyway, that was extremely frustrating, and then I had a conference call with Arushi and the book author about the book cover designs (which went well, by the way), and after spending another hour searching fruitlessly for the perfect stock photography image that the client wants for the book cover, I realized that I was just Completely. Out. Of. Energy. And when I told Doc that I didn’t think I could follow through on my promise to make spaghetti for dinner, I broke down and started crying. And then Arushi read my previous blog post and called to check on me, and […]

Read MoreA little broken.

Reached the breaking point.

I’m extremely worried about Doc. He’s had a rather intense headache (not sure if it’s cluster, he says it’s on the wrong side and feels more like a migraine with light sensitivity and all that) for eleven days straight with no break. For the past couple of days it was slowly getting less intense, but as of yesterday it’s getting worse again. Last night he came to bed at 3:30 a.m. and, as he said, barely felt human. He was whimpering in pain, he couldn’t go completely to sleep yet he couldn’t stay completely awake. I could barely understand his speech. I’m worried that something has happened, physically, in his brain. I don’t know what exactly, but I think someone needs to take some scans or something to see if they can figure out what’s going on. In addition to the 24-hours-a-day pain, he’s been experiencing double vision and light sensitivity. The thought that something might be growing/breaking/bursting in there is freaking me right the fuck out. His doctor was out of town last week and his office called in a prescription for him, which of course did almost nothing, and certainly didn’t treat the CAUSE of the headaches, whatever it may be. It was basically just Tylenol with barbituates, so it dulled the pain a little but made him feel “stupid” and zombie like. His sleep doctor recommended he call a local neurologist, who turned out to be Stuart Black, a world renowned headache specialist. Of course, Dr. Black doesn’t have any appointments until August 2008 (yes, that is a year from now) and the other doctor in his practice is booked up for the next 3 weeks. What is a person who is in acute chronic pain like this supposed to do in the meantime? What if something […]

Read MoreReached the breaking point.

Finding an all-night drugstore isn’t easy

Last night Doc and I spent nearly an hour driving around after midnight attempting to find a drugstore that was still open. We were looking for some sort of over-the-counter medication for his raging migraine headache. Yes, he’s now getting migraines in addition to clusters, sometimes at the same time. It’s unbelievably sucky. Seriously, can the man be in any more pain? Pain piled on top of pain on top of pain. I would not let him drive himself around at the level of hurting he was at, so I pulled on some pants and my glasses and hopped in the driver’s seat. We went to six places before we found one that was open (note to self: Remember, CVS at Walnut Hill and 75 is open 24 hours). Next task: to find out if Excedrin really IS “the headache medicine.”

Read MoreFinding an all-night drugstore isn’t easy

Caught red-handed showing feelings

I’d forgotten how much I love Pink Floyd’s film “The Wall.” We saw it at the Inwood last night at midnight with Brittney and Chris. We weren’t the oldest people in the audience but we definitely fell in the high end of the range. Near the beginning of the film, someone’s cell phone rang. The girl sitting in front of me turned to her boyfriend and asked, quite seriously, “Was that in the movie?” Sigh. Doc’s cluster headache cycle is just not going away. No screaming bad ones, but he has a headache almost constantly since about February. Saturday we went to three different health food stores looking for this capsaicin nasal spray which is said to help with migraines and anecdotally with some peoples’ clusters too. The first one was just a distribution center in an office park (closed), the second one was Roy’s Natural Market (closed on Saturdays… seriously, WTF?), and Whole Foods did not carry it. We may have to order it online. Our Whole Foods trip wasn’t a complete wash though; we spent a long time staring at the fabulously gorgeous desserts in the dessert cases. They are too pretty to eat. I just want to look at them all day! I purchased a new bottle of Dr. Bronner’s Peppermint Castile Soap. I love this stuff. The label, if you aren’t familiar with it (and if you’re not I suggest you read it!), will lead you to the conclusion that dear old Dr. Bronner was nearly all his pancakes short of a stack, but by God (pun intended) he can make some damn fine environmentally friendly non-sodium-lauryl-or-laureth-sulfate-containing liquid soap. It’s expensive but a little goes a long long way.

Read MoreCaught red-handed showing feelings

chemical spill

I think that I forgot to mention, when I was talking about my Saturday morning with migraine aura, that there was a very strong smell of enamel paint or some other type of chemical solvent near one side of the track. It was so strong that I didn’t want to breathe through my mouth on that half of the track. I wonder if this contributed to the migraine? I probably shouldn’t have stayed, now that I think about it. Live and learn.

Read Morechemical spill

migraine run

I ran my official 5-mile run this morning. It was harder to do than the 5-mile I did last Monday, possibly because it was morning instead of evening (less energy) and I was running by myself, but one of the crazy things about today was that I started getting a reverse migraine aura a little more than halfway through. I began having trouble seeing the screen of my iPod clearly but thought it was just due to glare from the fluorescent lighting overhead and the large number of “floaters” I have in my eyes. A few laps later I realized that it was because the center of my vision was disappearing. The little silver diagonal sparkle lines had started in the middle. I decided to keep going as long as I could, but to stop if I started to experience any pain or if my vision disappeared past the point where it was safe to run. I developed a plan for what to do if the pain started, involving finding a quiet dark room and a wet washcloth, possibly with the help of a gym staff member. The sparkles grew outward from the center of my vision in a donut-shaped oblong, slightly to the left of center with the right side pointing slightly upward, and I began to feel slightly nauseous. Eventually the aura reached the edge of my peripheral vision, and it disappeared completely by about 4.75 miles. I finished the run and cooldown walk, stretched, and felt well enough to drive home. My head has felt kind of funny all day, though; not pain exactly, but a strange feeling of pressure or like the pain is there right below the surface and if I thought about it, it would burst on through. So I’m trying to ignore it. […]

Read Moremigraine run

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