Childbirth has been so romanticized. I guess because if people really knew the truth… Narrator to 1950s husband and wife: “Congratulations! You’re expecting! Don’t worry, your doctor will tell you everything you need to know. Hi, Doctor!” Doctor: “You’ll fart, pee, puke, and poop in front of ten complete strangers who’ll be staring intently at your vagina, which, by the way, has an 80 percent chance of tearing!” Wife worriedly turns to husband: “You do it.”