April 2006

More on running

Yesterday after work I did Day One of the “Get Your Fat Lazy Ass Out Of The House Spring Training Program,” which was a mere 1.5 mile run (which I ran all of, in a row, without stopping). I achieved the ultra rare Holy Grail of How I Feel Whilst Exercising, which may have been due to what I ate for lunch (baked beans, a little sausage, an orange, carrots) and how long it had been since I ate (4 to 4.5 hours). I may have explained this before, but let me talk about the Holy Grail for a minute. When I’m running, I usually have one of the following conditions as a strike against me: My muscles building up too much lactic acid and burning/tiring out too quickly My heart rate and breathing going too fast and making my chest and back hurt Just plain no energy. Some combination of the above 3 unfortunate conditions. The Holy Grail occurs when my cardio is good, my muscles are not tiring out, and I have enough energy. It’s rare, but last night was one of those nights. If I’d had the time I would have continued running for maybe 3 miles, but I really did have some place to be and I was late. I felt good while I was going, just a teeny bit tired at the end, and I felt GREAT about an hour after I got done… I guess it was the adrenaline or something still in my system. Also, I timed myself, and when I’m feeling good like that and when it’s not 100 degrees outside, apparently I can do a 10 minute mile. At least I can at first… who knows what I’ll slow down to after a few miles. After I got done, we went […]

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The Fisher King

We just watched “The Fisher King.” I have not seen it since it first came out, which was something like 12 or 13 years ago. I think I understand it better now, and it both scared the crap out of me and made me feel so incredibly sad. The Red Knight is an amazing piece of cinematic achievement.

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i want my, i want my MTV…..

We spent about 6 hours last night moving refrigerators across the city and back in a Uhaul truck. And when I say “we,” I mean “mostly Doc.” He really worked hard. Those fuckers are monstrously heavy and kind of scary to manhandle. We acquired a new refrigerator (new to us, anyway) which we had to pick up from South Dallas, and then we transported our old fridge to Rich’s house on the complete other side of town. It took MUCH MUCH longer to move them than I anticipated. Plus, the fun part is that our door is too small to fit a fridge through. So we had to take the handles and doors off the old fridge to get it out of our house, and the new one to get it in. And come to find out, the new one has some problems — a water leak between the bottom of the door and the water dispenser, and the frame in the middle where the side by side doors meet is getting way too hot… too hot to touch. It burned my arm and left a red mark. I spent about 2 hours this morning cleaning out our lovely new fridge. It was pretty clean to begin with but I carefully washed all the shelves and wiped down the entire insides. Then we got the doors back on, plugged it in, and immediately noticed the little hot-frame problem and a little later noticed the water leak problem. I woke up with a killer headache that was not improved by the scent of the cleaning products I was using (natural, but still they give off fumes). And then the fact that after the ordeal of refrigerator moving and the hours I spent meticulously cleaning it, the damn thing wasn’t even working […]

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marathon training, day 3

Ran this afternoon, even though I really REALLY didn’t want to. It was over 100 degrees outside. I went my 3 mile route, and I think I ran nearly 2 miles of that. I had water but halfway through I had to quit drinking it because it was just sitting in my stomach making me feel nauseous and it was SO hot outside that I was afraid if I kept up that pace I might throw up or faint. So I mixed in some long walking stretches and kept crossing the street to walk wherever there was shade. I’ve got a LONG ways to go. It’s going to be fucking scalding outside for most of my training time before the marathon. I may have to figure out an alternative locale. I seriously thought about calling Yvonne and telling her that I wasn’t going to do it, because today it felt like there was NO WAY I will EVER be able to run 13 miles if I can’t even run 2 without feeling like I’m going to die. But I know that I’ve got nearly 8 months between now and the race. I’ll get better, and my debate with myself over quitting today is going to seem absolutely silly. On my return route, I walked past a woman sweeping her sidewalk. She appeared to be my age, maybe a little older. I smiled as I passed and said “Hi” to be friendly (which is totally against my nature… as an introvert, I am uncomfortable with strangers, but I had kind of a revelation that if I don’t start faking social norms I’m going to end up one of those cranky old people that nobody likes). Anyway, I said hello and she smiled really big and said “You are looking so GOOD, […]

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marathon training, day 1

Yes, I think I’ve finally lost my mind. I have decided to train for a marathon. Probably only a half marathon. (This is me we’re talking about, after all.) The furthest I’ve ever run before at one stretch is 5K (3.3 miles). So now I’m gonna do 13.1? Ha! Last week sometime, when Doc came to bed I half woke up and said to him “I think that I have to run a marathon.” A couple days later I told Yvonne about this crazy thing I said while asleep, and she suggested, “Why not? If you want to run one half of the White Rock Marathon in December, I’ll run the other.” I thought about it for a couple of days and realizeda) it will be a really good personal challenge, something in my life I can be truly proud of;b) If I was doing it on my own, I could change my mind and quit in the middle of training, but when someone else is counting on me to do my part, that’s not going to happen; andc) When we go to Belize next year I’ll probably be in much better shape and may even be able to put on a swimsuit without shame! So. Today begins my training in earnest. I’m thinking about running with Yvonne regularly, getting a treadmill, and/or joining some sort of running training group.

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Post-Angst angst

I thought it was fitting to let Angst rule my blog for a week. I miss him. It’s been really hard, especially at bedtime. Every night when I’d get into bed, he used to hop up on the bed and sit on Doc’s side, waiting for me to scratch his head. He could never get enough. I’d scratch and scratch and rub his ears and pat his butt, and sometimes he’d be so happy he’d just flop over on his side and let me scratch his tummy too. This was kind of a ritual for him and me. Doc and he had lots of rituals and special things, but this was really the only thing that he came to me for. So now when I walk into the bedroom, I still half expect to see him on top of the cat tower or sleeping on the chair. Sometimes I see one of the dark throw pillows sitting on the chair and my heart gives a little jump. Last night I dreamed that a cat that looked just like him was in our house, and part of me knew that it couldn’t really be him, but I didn’t want to think that or say it because what if thinking it or saying it made it true? I kind of knew it was true but I didn’t want it to be, so I decided to live in the illusion that he’d come back or that he’d not died in the first place. That phone call Monday morning was horrible. They’d called at 7:30 and left a message on my cell phone asking me to call back as soon as possible. I knew it wasn’t good news, because if it was just a status report they would have left more information on the […]

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Sick Angst

Angst stopped eating and drinking about a week ago, near as we can tell. Last Tuesday, we could audibly hear him taking each breath through a clogged nose. He’s always been a little sneezy and wheezy so we weren’t sure if we should be worried. He stopped using the litterbox, and he stayed in the corner in the back of Doc’s closet, hiding. Thursday night we took him to the emergency hospital because we were afraid he wasn’t going to make it. His breathing sounded rattly and sporadic, and he looked so thin. He weighed 7.8 pounds, which is about 2 pounds less than he weighed a couple of months ago. They gave him fluids and antibiotics, and said if he didn’t perk up by Saturday, to take him to our vet. He only seemed to get worse. We went to the store and bought one of each different kind of cat food we could find, cans and pouches and treats and little dried fish and something called, creepily enough, “catmilk.” He wouldn’t touch any of it. Twice we force-fed him spongy canned kitten food with a pastry tube, and he tried to spit as much of it out as he could. This morning we took him to our veterinarian. He was diagnosed with pneumonia, severe asthma (and having attacks), and the early stages of liver failure. They planned to give him fluids, steroids, antibiotics, and put him in a nebulizing chamber to get medication directly to his lungs. He needs to be hospitalized until at least Monday. We just got back from visiting him, and he looked a bit more alert. Doc was able to get him to voluntarily eat some canned food. It’s touch and go, very much so; he could have an asthma attack that could prove […]

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